Building a Relationship with God and the Struggle to Read Scripture

The question has two parts that belong together: the struggle to read the Bible, and the desire to build a relationship with God. It is common to hear formulaic answers: more devotional time, more prayer, find an application in every verse, and so on. While there is truth in some of that, it can easily become a burden rather than a help.

A better starting point is to think about how relationships work in ordinary life and then apply that insight in a grace-focused way to our walk with God.

Relationship and Gratitude

Often we feel closer to people when we dwell on what they have done for us. When someone has helped us in a time of need, or consistently shown kindness, we naturally want to maintain and deepen the relationship. We do not need a course in relationship techniques; it grows because we value the person and are grateful for what they have done.

In similar fashion, one of the healthiest ways to foster a relationship with God is to become consciously aware of his grace. Reflect on what he has done for you in Christ, on the daily mercies you receive, on the ways you have been sustained or guided. As gratitude deepens, so does the desire to know him, to be like him, and to please him.

Building a relationship with God, then, is less about cleverly designed spiritual exercises and more about knowing and appreciating his character and his actions.

Being Like God in Character

Another way to speak of “relationship with God” is to speak of likeness to him in character. The more we seek to align our attitudes, values, and behavior with what we see of God in Scripture, the more we are living in step with him.

This does not require dramatic emotional experiences. It is the quiet, deliberate effort to:

• Remove from our lives what is contrary to his character.
• Cultivate what reflects his character.
• Think about situations in light of his perspective as revealed in Scripture.

Pursuing that likeness is itself an expression of relationship.

Reading the Bible for Content, Not Constant Inspiration

Many struggle with Bible reading because they have been taught to expect each passage to deliver a direct, emotive, personal “devotional” impact. When they encounter sections like prophetic oracles against ancient cities, or detailed descriptions of long-ago events, they feel disappointed or confused.

The problem is not with the Bible; it is with unrealistic expectations. The Bible is fundamentally a content book—a book of histories, prophecies, instructions, and doctrines. It should be read, first of all, for what it says, not for what we want to “feel” from it at that moment.

A healthier approach is:

• Read the Bible to learn its content: who is speaking, to whom, about what, and in what context.
• Ask questions of the text—questions you can answer and questions you cannot—and let that drive further study.
• Accept that some passages will be immediately stirring, while others will build background knowledge that later passages will draw upon.

2 Timothy 2:15 calls us to “study” rather than to extract a new devotional sensation from every verse. Studying Scripture as content, with patience, ends up deepening our understanding of God’s character and ways, which in turn nourishes relationship.

Connecting Relationship and Scripture

To build your relationship with God while you struggle with Bible reading:

• Shift your expectation: look for knowledge first, feelings second. Let inspiration be a byproduct, not the goal.
• Especially watch for what passages reveal about God’s character—his faithfulness, righteousness, patience, mercy—and note those traits.
• Consciously thank him for specific ways his grace has been evident in your life.
• Seek to align your own character with the traits you see in him.

Over time, this steady, content-based engagement with Scripture, combined with a growing awareness of grace, naturally fosters a deeper relationship with God. It is not flashy or formulaic, but it is solid and sustainable.

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